Perspective
Life has a way of giving you what you need. Like when your shopping for bedding.
I’ve been…I don’t know what…lately. A pain in my own ass? I’m not sure that’s a sufficient statement. But I’ve been in my own head, caught up in everything I have to do and in general inflicting shitty feelings on myself. It all stems from one thing:
I am behind.
Like, hella behind. Turns out that if you have your own business and you take a 2 week vacation then become stupid-sick for another week, nothing gets done with your work. It just waits for you. And it multiplies. Which means other people are waiting on you. And that, my friends I do not deal well with.
My clients are waiting for their finished product, lots of people are wondering when the hell I’m going to finish writing the Ireland blog posts, my sheets would like to know when they are going to get changed and me…well…I’d just like to take a shower that lasts longer than 2.5 minutes. Oh and that husband of mine, has anyone seen him?
I don’t deal with this like a rational person. I kick my own ass for it. I obsess over every little thing that is getting put off. I see none of the finished and all of the next-in-line. I feel guilty if I stop being productive long enough to eat dinner in peace.
I know, its ridiculous.
So anyway, when I was searching the internet for the perfect bedding (because my bedroom remodel is among the things not getting done) I found this and it was exactly what I needed…
“I continued to think about the “Future Me” and what I would think of the present me. And Future Me had a bit of advice. He said that we are living in a home, eating applesauce, wearing diapers and all I have are my memories. Don’t screw them up. Spend time with your friends and family, because those are my favorite memories. Stop spending so much time on the little stuff, you can barely remember that anyway. Travel more, you will love Africa. Take a few chances, but not too many that you look like a moron (and you are approaching that level so be careful). Enjoy your successes and indulgences, you will see that guilt is a waste of time. Do things for others without the need for acknowledgment or reciprocation (you will get both in spades anyway). Be happy for others who are more fortunate than you, help those that aren’t, respect both equally. Do things you normally wouldn’t do every so often, those are some fun memories. It is okay to cook and do the dishes, but make sure you say thank you when someone does for you. When you get here (the future) you don’t want to have settled.
We could all benefit from calling our Future Me’s every once in a while. We need that reality check of how most of this won’t matter even a few months from now, much less years. We need to live a little more for the moment.
That doesn’t mean go crazy. It doesn’t mean bounce your last check. It doesn’t mean shun stability and responsibility. It doesn’t mean pack up your shit and move to Nepal. It means to do things you will be happy to look back on. That may mean taking the stable job for some, or going with the start-up for others or even leaving it all behind and going to Nepal for a few. Life isn’t black and white. There is no need for you to be stable or reckless…you can be somewhere in-between. You don’t have to married by 28. You don’t need to have kids before you are 35. You don’t need to have your career all set by the time you are 40. Life is different for everyone and very few of us live up to the expectations we set for ourselves or other set for us (and those that do probably feel unfilled in some way). Take life as it comes, change it as you go, and stop worrying about where you are now…just enjoy that you are here and moving forward. It takes some people a few years, others a life time. We all get there.
You are a fluid and ever-changing person who is at times scared, happy, sad, bored, worried and excited. Perfect…that’s how you are supposed to be. Think about the future, think about what you want to look back on, and then stop thinking about the future so much. Re-live the good times in the past. Learn from the bad ones and move on…they are not you anymore. Forget the really bad ones. They serve no purpose anymore. Realize that life is both what you make of it, but more importantly how you want to approach it. You can get bogged down with your own shit or you cannot. The choice is yours.”
Perspective can be hard to find. Glad I found it. On a home interiors blog, no less.
And for a bit of bonus perspective…
Whenever I get overloaded with work I repeat the phrase “Just be thankful to be working” over and over again. A lot of people have no jobs. So I make it a mission to never take for granted that I have two jobs. But what I also need to remember is that I’m lucky to have the job. The one I know I was meant to do, the one I love even when it is making my life a big, hot mess.
“Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking, and don’t settle. As with all matters of the heart, you’ll know when you find it.” – Steve Jobs
What? You thought I was going to be the only person on the planet not to quote Steve Jobs today?
If you’ll excuse me now, I’m going to go work my ass for exactly 3 more hours. Then I’m stopping. And I’m putting away my to-do list. I’ll be caught up enough. My house is clean enough. The Ireland blogs will get written in time. Our friends are coming over for a party on Friday and my family is coming to visit on Saturday. This is one of the most colorful, beautiful falls I’ve ever seen. The Future Me would prefer it if I’d just go make some memories.
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